Dear persons of the opposite gender

The Argentine Tango

Dear persons of the opposite gender...to me. I'm male. I'll keep this short, as the possibilities of muddling the message with humorous examples...somehow agitates me. Instead I'll speak in a very formal...maybe "bookish" way, and say, "...damn it woman. blah!"

There are several ways to categorize women. I don't care if you blanch, and the point is not to categorize here. But I thought i might mention that if you are of the opposite gender...to me, and you get loads of attention from the male sex for plenty of normal reasons and because you're good looking, then i suppose tonight i simply wish to say i've seen...most of you, that is, you and every other woman who has received plenty (maybe too much) attention for being attractive fit nicely into the "lame communicators category". That's not to say you aren't smart and don't have interesting things to say, but it is to say you don't seem responsive...when i am. (i will explain that in paragraph 3: jared's category) You don't seem responsive to me when i am communicating to you because a lot of people are looking at you. Your attention is divided. That annoys me a bit. Maybe you should pay better attention. I won't tell you what to notice because I'm learning how to kill and not kill relationships. You know, telling someone, "you weary me...sigh...don't you see this or that or it's impolite?" or "But I thought I might mention...."

Paragraph 3: I believe I fit this category, and that is, I probably find something interesting in most people, women. That is not because I'm so unselfish or even considerate. It is because I'm curious. ...this curiosity makes me engaging, I think. I enjoy getting to know people. I mean to find why you are interesting because you inherently are.

Paragraph 4: The effect. or the affect? With women there is something that happens in the brain where the woman thinks I'm into her. I don't know on what level. I don't know if it's me. But the upshot is either she wants to go on getting to know me in a less than platonic way, maybe even super fast, reminiscent of a train coming straight me (and I must indicate something decisive), or the other woman, lameo communicator, drops all dialog however innocent or interested. (Are you an amnesiac? no, I don't think so either.) I begrudgingly love her because this is how the dance goes. As I see it, it's almost the same dance, with one, then the other. In fact, I begrudging love both...and I think maybe I don't love dancing. It's possible I may be good at it.

In the "platonica dance", you check out your partner. You don't dance on them. You dance with them. You don't stand at a distance, staring, pretending. You hold hands. This is how to dance. I'm okay now with rejection. It's even helpful. I appreciate confident response to the prospects of dancing...in a huge ball with tons of people to look at and aperitif to enjoy, one dance at a time. I'm less okay with women who are dodgy or who can't relax and enjoy themselves or dancing.

Dancing is dancing. It is not making love. It isn't even walking down the street holding hands. Believe me, I can't wait to "dance" all over a king's size bed. But that doesn't happen too often: 1 partner, 1 dance...and the rest is history. In fact, I think we're supposed to become good dancers, men and women. I think dancing helps us enjoy each other. And this leads me to the last way you can categorize me...at least tonight. Men and women go to a dance and communicate they want to dance. All kinds of signals are sent. Men lead, and if it's romance, you both know it. If it's romance, you'll know it. I'm might even abruptly tell you, ask you. "Can we date? Can I date you? I have a new dance." So...please let misconceptions go and wait for me. I want to let you know.

What I meant to say:
"Damn it woman"
If it seems I’m communicating with you, do you mind paying attention and being polite? It’s only dialogue/dancing the platonica.Get over yourself.
I’m curious and so are you.
I’m not taking you seriously for a long while. I promise to tell you if it’s romance.
Don’t run me over and don’t avoid me. That only creates misconceptions…which may be damaging...for you and for me.
Prior to clear romantic interest, I do believe flirting is fine. The "platonica dance" is not misleading.
Learn to enjoy dancing. I am too.
Wait for me. Meanwhile, dance. Don't forget to smile. You look radiant.